So, how do we do this? How do we let go? Ask yourself why you are holding on? What fear makes you hold onto this situation?
Someone recently wrote to me about trust, being unable to trust another person. This is a perfect gift to learn the healing of letting go. When we can’t trust another, we have to understand where this mistrust came from. How it mirrors within our life, and experiences we need to heal. It isn’t just the other person, or persons in our life, that we can’t heal, that is the problem. Although often we feel that if the other person could heal, be different, then everything would be okay. However, it is never about the other person, it is about our own healing. We also must examine our own beliefs bout trust, do we trust ourself? Do we trust our parents, family, friends or significant other, and what are they mirroring within us, so we can embrace our suffering and let go? Where did this initiate? Were our parents examples of this? Was it something we took personally, which means our lesson, that we are learning about trust from our parents? Or was it in their relationship that trust became an issue, and you learned the pattern, and now it plays out in your own relationships? This is a subtle difference that shifts how you react in situations! One, is how it personally related to you, where you don’t trust, because your personal security was at risk. Or two it was a learned pattern that your parents taught you. One is your issue to heal, and the other one is you taking on the karma of your parents. Patterns are interesting dynamics, they are gifts for us to see how important each and every situation that comes from a pattern has entered our life. These are usually part and parcel of an issue we choose to work with, and offered several contracts in our life to heal this issue. Once healed the contracts are free to interact in a healthy relationship, that is mutually supportive and beneficial for both, and karma free. This is where I feel we are moving towards, as we heal our deepest wounds and embrace our darkest shadows!
So, if trust was your issue, why are you holding onto trust? Where did the first incident occur and can you take responsibility for your reaction in it? If this was karmic, it may not be completely yours, but rather a learned pattern from our parents. It does neither your parents nor you any good to live out the karma of someone else. If it is karmic and yours, which means a direct experience happened to you, where you learned that you can’t trust in a relationship. Then you have to become conscious of how you react and make different choices. Also, discovering where it came from, allows you to be more aware of how to act differently. Awareness is key and choices on how we respond versus react is necessary in our healing! Becoming unattached to the outcome is the key to our healing, and this brings us to addictions.